Consideration of Parents’ Beliefs

about Guiding Children’s Usage of the Internet

Rully Khairul Anwar

, Edwin Rizal

,and M. Taufiq Rahman

Faculty of Communication, Padjadjaran University, Jatinangor, Indonesia

Faculty of Social and Political Science, UIN SunanGunungDjati, Bandung, Indonesia

Keywords: sociology of education, internet life, children’s aspirations, domestic communication

Abstract: This research examines the performance of parents in guiding their children’s usage of the internet in the

village of Majalengka Regency, West Java, Indonesia. How did the parents control their children’s usage of

the internet and how did their children react to the questions being answered in this research. The research

used a qualitative approach to get the natural settings in which there are many behaviours and events which

occur. This research also used a communicative theory of interactionism, because the theory could lead the

researchers to an understanding of the structure, regulation and parental procedures that could have a

significant impact on family education. This research found that to perform parents' functions as a guide, the

parents always make themselves available for their children. So, the parents collect the children's aspirations

and accommodate them and follow up the aspirations. And, also, to address children's complaints, parents

give a moral and psychological explanation to the children. This was one of the many solutions to address

children addiction to the gadgets.

1 INTRODUCTION

Adolescence is a transition period when a person is

about to enter a self-sufficient age, but a teenager is

not yet entirely responsible for themselves or the

community. This period of transition depends on the

circumstances and the social level of the community

in which you live. The more advanced the society,

the longer the adolescent is because they must

prepare to adapt themselves to society (Bowlby,

2012).

Adolescence is one period of human

development. This period is a period of transition

from childhood to adulthood that includes biological

changes. Changes in psychology and social changes

in most societies and cultures of adolescence

generally begin at the age of 13-15 years and end at

the age of 18-22 years (Blum et al., 2014).

Family plays an important role in accompanying

teenagers in guiding what they should do inside and

outside the house. The role is an individual role that

finally manifests rights and obligations. Knowing

the role of the family is very important because,

from here, the ideal and harmonious family figure is

measured and could be read (O’Keeffe and Clarke-

Pearson, 2011).

The key success for parents in giving motivation

and guiding their children lies in how close their

relationship is with the children. No one can

completely replace the role of parents. Parents are

placing where children ask for protection and obtain

peace through harmony between order and

tranquillity, by things from outside their house

(Bowlby, 2012).

The role of the family in the supervision and

guiding the development of early teenagers of 13 to

15 years is significant. It is true in today's era that

many teenagers, especially those aged 13-15 years,

use the internet without supervision and guidance

from parents. Meanwhile, there are many impacts

caused by the internet, including the negative

impacts. Therefore, it is imperative that parents play

a role in guiding and supervising the use of internet

media for the development of their children. In this

case, parents should have the concept of information

literacy, as well as their children (Anwar et al.,

2017).

Anwar, R., Rizal, E. and Rahman, M.

Consideration of Parents’ Beliefs about Guiding Children’s Usage of the Internet.

DOI: 10.5220/0008818901950199

In Proceedings of the 4th International Conference on Contemporary Social and Political Affairs (ICoCSPA 2018), pages 195-199

ISBN: 978-989-758-393-3

195

Most of the parents still underestimate the fact

that the internet is the biggest pornography library in

the world that should be avoided by the children.

The results of the survey conducted by the Child

Protection Commission or KomisiPerlindunganAnak

Indonesia (KPAI) among 4,500 junior high school

and senior high school students in 12 major cities in

Indonesia, were shocking. Overall, 97% of

respondents confessed they had already accessed

sites that contain pornography and also watch porn

videos through the internet (Aditya, 2013). Even

worse, 36% of the parents, because of the minimum

effort of supervising, didn't know what their children

were accessing them. Only a few parents

acknowledge what is being obtained by their

children while online, and, on average, children

spent 64 hours online per month (Sufa, 2014).

As Symantec Norton has revealed, the three most

commonly used search engines by teenagers aged

13-15 years are YouTube, Google, and Facebook.

While the word "porn" and "sex" are in the second

position in Symantec data. Although it does not

reveal which country the child is from, at least

parents in Indonesia should consider this thing

(Sufa, 2014).

Teenagers around 13-15 years old have their

world; they have a curious sense of everything and

always want to try everything new. Youth live and

think only for the present moment; they do not think

of a distant past nor a future that they are clueless

about. Therefore, parents should be able to make the

reality of the present a starting point and learning

method for children. The development of a teen

character is influenced by the behaviour of the

family towards the character of a person formed

earlier; in this case, a certain family role is very

influential (Mustari & Rahman, 2014).

If associated with sociological theory, family as

the smallest social institution plays an important role

regarding the formation of individual characters. The

family becomes so important because, through the

family, one's life is formed. As the smallest social

institution, the family is a miniature of social

complexity, because, starting from the family, a

teenager experiences the process of socialisation.

The family is the first and main social unit as the

primary foundation for adolescent development. In

that sense, either for good or bad, a family is very

influential on the formation of one's personality

(Rahman, 2011).

In the family, children learn to socialise, think,

live, and feel all aspects of life that are reflected in

culture. It can be used as a frame of reference in

every action in life. The role of the individual in the

family is based on expectations and behaviour

patterns of families, groups, and communities

(O’Keeffe & Clarke-Pearson, 2011).

The question arises, how the circumstances of

parents whom their children in teenager age and can

be influenced by the development of information

technology such as internet? The following research

aims to answer the question. By focusing on a

location in rural areas in Majalengka, West Java,

here is a story about family communication between

parents and children regarding internet influence.

2 RESEARCH METHOD

In this research, the descriptive method was used

with the aim that this method would provide a

clearer description of social situations and could

describe the situation in a systematic, objective and

precise way (Lindlof & Taylor, 2017). The type of

data used in this research are qualitative data

because qualitative data are more comprehensive in

understanding the phenomena in the community. In

this research, the data collection techniques used

were: observation, interview, and a study of

literature. The sources of data in this study are data

obtained directly from the parties involved: parents

who have early teenagers (13 to 15 years old) that

use the internet. Other data sources (secondary) are

sourced from supporting data that is obtained from

the literature taken from journals, books, magazines

or newspapers, and the internet.

3 FINDINGS AND DISCUSSION

The constant development of information

technology today is convenience for the public to

obtain information. One of the most widely used

types of communication information technology

today is the internet. The development of the internet

leads in all directions, including negative ones,

making parents feel worried about the internet.

Parents often feel worried about the internet

because it could have negative impacts on their

children. Sometimes children could forget about

their rights as human beings, children get lost in

time and socialise less with their friends and many

more. Therefore, as a parent, it is necessary to guide

and supervise their children to use the internet media

at the right time and in a limited way; children

should not forget the time and not forget their duties

ICoCSPA 2018 - International Conference on Contemporary Social and Political Affairs

196

as a child, such as doing school work (interview

with SW, parents, 8/7/2017).

The increasing number of online activities

among children has become a threat. Parents need to

do more than warn their child about the content of

the internet. Looking at the facts, it is recommended

that parents use internet filters to restrict internet use

for their children. In these circumstances, the most

urgent thing to do is to discuss with children the

topics that make them curious, so it's better that the

children get information from their parents instead

of from the internet (Levin & Kilbourne, 2008).

Family SW, for example, is always firm in

supervising and guiding their son. Their son RM,

never uses the internet while he is alone, he is never

allowed to go to an internet kiosk to play games with

his friends. Their son must be supervised while

using the internet (interview with SW, parent,

8/7/2017). Parents FA, on the other hand, are

limiting the amount of time for their children using

the laptop for surfing the internet. FA do not mind

taking the laptop from their children if it’s already

beyond a reasonable time (interview with FA,

parents, 8/7/2017).

Based on the results of interviews and

observations in the field, the following data were

obtained: from 15 families, six families guide and

supervise their children while using the internet,

while the remaining nine families never guide and

supervise. From 20 teenagers, eight teenagers are

avoiding the negative impact of the internet by not

accessing unusual content, while the rest, 12

teenagers, confess they have seen pornographic

photos and videos on the internet either intentionally

or unintentionally.

The family behaviour influences the

development of a teen's character. A person's

character is formed early, so the role of the family is

very influential. The family is the smallest social

group in society. Every family member (father,

mother, and child) has a socialisation process to

understand the culture prevailing in society. From

interviews with parents, they can be a reliable

teacher for their children. Therefore, parents play an

important role in the early education process for

children. The precise information about sexuality,

for example, must be given by parents though,

however, the sense of taboo is still haunting parents

in Indonesia who are adapting Eastern culture

(interview with DN, parents, 20/7/2017).

For example, both in the village and city now

Internet kiosks are available and parents can entrust

their children to the kiosk owner/guard to guide and

supervise what their children access on the internet

or parents can limit the time usage on the internet for

their children. Parents should also tell their children

what things are good for them to use. If the child

often accesses the internet on a smartphone or other

device, then as far as possible, the parents should

control what he accesses from the device. Just like

MT said: "I always limit the time of my child when

using the internet on my laptop, and I divide his time

with positive activities." This is because when using

the internet, children often forget their rights as

children; sometimes children forget the time to eat,

pray, bathe, read the Quran, and others. Parents

often feel worried about that attitude, so MT often

take the laptop if it's already over time, and MT set

the time for their child also to do positive things

such as go to the mosque (interview with MT,

parents, 20/7/2017).

Addiction to playing on the computer is

suspected to trigger children to be lazy about

writing, drawing or performing social activities. A

playing computer addiction can happen mainly

because, earlier, the parents do not make certain

rules regarding playing the computer. According to

HS, as chairman of the RW in Blok Pajawan, parents

need to make a deal with the child about the time for

playing computer. For example, a child may play

computer after school and after finishing homework

for only one hour. The other free time could be used

for doing other things. This timing is necessary so

that children do not think that playing the computer

is the only activity that is interesting. This rule needs

to be monitored by parents from early on. At a later

age, it is expected that the child can manage the time

well (interview with HS, RW chairman, 20/7/2017).

The question that often arises in parents' minds is

whether the existing media could support the process

of educating children? Does the media have a

positive or negative effect on the child? Of course,

there are a lot of answers regarding these questions.

Of course, there are those who argue the media is

very useful because the media have various

information that can be obtained. Indeed, some

parents strongly agree once and never feel worried

about their children who often use the internet media

although not supervised by the parents. The reasons

given by such parents is that the internet that exists

today is very useful because it provides insight into

the development of children (interview with UA,

chairman of RW, 20/7/2017).

But there are some who do not like the internet

because they feel that the internet has a negative

impact on children (interview with YH, parents,

20/7/2017). Of course, a wise attitude to internet

usage could happen if the parents give the right

Consideration of Parents’ Beliefs about Guiding Children’s Usage of the Internet

197

understanding about the internet; besides this, the

government should also make policies to manage it.

Considering the advantages and disadvantages of

introducing internet to children, in the end, it is very

dependent on the readiness of parents to introduce

and supervise their children while playing on the

computer. Therefore, all parents, it is expected,

could give a precise understanding of how to be wise

in using the internet media (O’Keeffe & Clarke-

Pearson, 2011).

The increasing amount of information regarding

the dangers of social networking sites like Facebook,

Twitter, and others, lately increasingly reinforces the

need for intensive participation of parents to protect

their children in cyberspace. The first thing many

parents need to realise is that their children will

always have access to the internet, no matter how

much they try to control what their children do and

see in that virtual world (interview with AF, child,

9/7/2017).

The Internet is also no less sophisticated with the

medium itself. Lately, it is the internet that is more

developed. Millions of people use the internet for

various purposes, ranging from personal and

organisational, to official work purposes, because

the internet is considered more practical. For

education, many schools have started to use the

internet as an important tool in learning activities

(interview with AF, children, 9/7/2017).

DR, as a child said, many benefits could be

obtained from the internet, especially in the process

of communication and information. But there are not

a few who abuse the use of the internet, not a few

teenagers who have bad morals, are lazy about study

because almost all their time is spent surfing the

internet. Moreover, teenagers who dare to open porn

sites, they all always convey a variety of reasons

when they get caught. For example, they all have a

high sense of curiosity. (interview with DR, child,

9/7/2017).

Also, children are also affected by the adults’

talk. Those who saw even just a glimpse of porn will

continue to watch it because they are addicted. Soon

their attitude will change to be worse, and they will

all be involved in promiscuity (Mustari & Rahman,

2014).

Internet media nowadays cannot be separated

from positive and negative impacts on adolescent

development. As a connector between many people,

the internet certainly has positive benefits. Benefits

could be gained when it is utilised for a proper

intention. The positive impact of internet usage

includes its use as the media of communication,

internet as a medium of data exchange. For example,

with e-mail data can be distributed easily. Data

could be files, images, and more. The internet is

beneficial for browsing information quickly, as a

medium of information education, culture, business,

and others, and as a medium of entertainment

(Budiana et al., 2016).

Besides the positive impact, the use of the

internet as a significant medium in the development

of this era, certainly also could cause negative

impacts. Negative impacts that can be generated

from internet usage are: the internet can trigger

things related to pornography. The internet, with its

scope that spans the globe, can lead to fraud, can

lead to the existence of gambling, and can also cause

addiction (Budiana et al., 2016).

The internet can cause a severe addiction; an

example that is happening in society today is that a

child may be willing to spend hours in front of his

computer to use the internet non-stop. The internet is

used for many things, to the extent that a child can

forget to eat and do other activities. It can be bad

and could get worse because an addiction will be

hard to cure. The internet can reduce one's social

nature. No wonder if then there are parents who

limit the association of their children with the

internet. They even encourage their children to

socialise face-to-face with society (interview with

FA, child, 8/7/2017).

From the positive and negative impacts of

internet usage, people should wisely make

themselves healthy internet users, which involves

making use of the internet well, wisely, and

maximally for useful purposes and producing

something positive for themselves and society.

Some parties reject the use of the internet. Mrs.

KT, for example, forbids her children from using

internet media and surfing the internet in internet

kiosks or on smartphones because she feels she

cannot supervise and guide when her children use

the internet, so she forbids her children from using

the internet. This action is taken because she thinks

the internet can degrade the religious education that

she already teaches her children (interview with KT,

parent, 9/7/2017).

But there are also parents who believe that there

are lots of benefits from the internet (interview with

TT, parents, 9/7/2017). Therefore, to avoid the

negative impact of internet usage, it is necessary for

internet users to understand what the internet is and

how internet usage should be. It is also necessary for

the parents and family to help as the controller of

children's internet usage so that the internet itself

becomes a thing that leads to good things that are

beneficial (Levin & Kilbourne, 2008).

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From the research, there are things that parents

should do to guide and supervise the use of internet

media among teenagers, including:

 giving children time to learn and interact with

computers from an early age, especially

considering that the use of computers is

something that cannot be avoided in this

modern era. Here, parents can provide

guidance so that children can use the internet

properly according to their age;

 if the parent is unable to guide their children

directly, then the parent should supervise them

through persons who are entrusted to be

supervisors for their children while using the

internet.

4 CONCLUSIONS

Based on the explanation above, this research can

lead to the following conclusions: 1) the need for a

parental role in guiding and supervising teenagers in

the use of internet media. Similarly, because it found

a negative impact of internet media if the parents do

not guide and supervise teenagers’ internet usage,

including children not obeying their parents,

children often imitate the style and behaviour that

they see through the internet, and teenagers can be

addicted to the internet. So, to avoid the negative

impact of internet usage, participation from the

parents to help as the controller of internet users is

necessary so that the internet could give beneficial

things; 2) based on the effects that could occur

through use of the internet, as an anticipation, it

necessary to know how to overcome an addiction to

the internet. Parents, who have an important role in

guiding and supervising their teenager, have to limit

their teenagers’ amount of time for using the

internet; 3) parents have to supervise and limit their

child's society while the child is still under

supervision. Parents should give an understanding to

their children about the dangers of the outside world.

Parents should make it clear that not everything on

the internet is true, because the virtual world

(internet) and reality have differences; and 4) parents

should be able to give a clear understanding to their

teenagers regarding the rules at home, though they

should not let the child feel depressed with the many

rules because teenagers have an unstable psyche.

Give the teenagers the freedom to choose but

continue to supervise. Parents should accompany

their children while doing activities such as when

playing on the internet. They should provide support

when studying or while using the internet, and guide

the activities according to the childrens' ages.

Because parents are role models for life, they

become an influence on the growth of children.

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